Thursday, December 25, 2014

Dreams: The Girl in the Dark Green Dress


He stood in the doorway unable to talk himself into walking into the house. Why couldn’t he move forward? He took a deep sigh and contemplated turning around on his heels to just leave. That’s when an image of her flashed inside of his head. He stood up straight and thought to himself, Oh, that’s right SHE is going to be here. He took a couple steps into the entrance way. It was progress. That is when he heard a familiar voice call out his name. He looked up and saw his brother walking towards him. This was the younger brother, but only by months apart. He let out a sigh again. His brother took him by the arm and began to drag him to the dining room where the rest of the voices were coming from. He saw familiar faces and returned each smile that the people in the room were sending towards him. The younger brother let go of his arm and looked to him and mouthed the words, “Don’t worry.” He nodded. That is when he noticed the bar in the back of the room. His feet didn’t have to register the signals his mind was sending, that was the destination he wanted to go. He reached the bar and grabbed the whiskey from the shelf. He popped the lid off and sat in the back of the room watching the familiar strangers’ converse with one another. She wasn’t here. He took a swig. It is better for both of us that she isn’t here. He took another swig. He continued to sit at the back of the room and drink away his thoughts.

+---------------+
She stood in the hallway. She stopped dead in her tracks. She heard his name being called out in the front of the house. Why is he here? She thought to herself. She could only bear having the younger brother here, but now, both of them were under the same roof as she. She was snapped out of her daydream when a pair hands grabbed her by the shoulders and turned her around. She was facing the younger brother. He opened his mouth to speak, but she was too much in a daze to register the words that were spoken.
                “Are you even listening to me? Anna you need to listen. Hello,” he had both his hands grasping her shoulders while shaking her with each word he said.
                “Oh, I’m sorry. I couldn’t focus.” She murmured.
                “Anna, Please do not go anywhere near him.” He begged her.
                She began to day dream again and when she came to she let out a sigh, “I understand.”
                “It’ll be the end of you both. You know what will happen,” he bent down to face her directly.
                “I understand,” she repeated again.
She felt the weight begin to tighten in her chest with each breath she began to take. The younger brother let go of her shoulders and walked passed her back into the other room. The chatter continued. With the warning she was just given, she stood in the hallway a moment longer to gather her thoughts.

+-------------+     
He was probably on his twelfth shot of whiskey, when he saw a woman’s figure in a dark green dress enter the room.  He watched her as she cautiously walked into the room and through the people. Her head was held low, while her dark black hair was draped over the sides of her face. She looked familiar he thought. He stood up and wanted to get a closer look at who the woman was, but she had already made it into the next room before he had a chance to look. He took another swig. He began to follow suit of the girl in the dark green dress. When he got to the dining room doorway, a hand grasped on to his arm. He looked back at the owner of the hand. It wasn’t her.  It’s not her. His heart dropped a little bit into his stomach. The owner of the hand mouthed a couple words to him, but the words were wasted. His thoughts were only about her.  Unable to be rude, he stood there in the conversation and pretended to listen. He was waiting for the moment so that he could go find the woman in the dark green dress.

+--------------------+
She had made it successfully into the den without being seen. She took a deep sigh. She felt the weight lift off her shoulders a little bit. She stood next to the table of refreshments and recalled the scene that just played. When she had walked into the room, she noticed him right away. He was sitting there in grey skinny jeans, a mismatched tie, and a fedora on top of his curly hair. She smiled. She noticed in his left hand was a bottle of whiskey. She frowned. She knew exactly how he would get if he would drink.  As long as he didn’t see her, she was safe. She turned to the refreshments table and noticed tubes of liquid sitting in a tray. Alcohol? She thought. She grabbed one and drank it in one gulp. Yep. Definitely alcohol. She grabbed a couple more and drank each one gracefully like the one before it. It wasn’t till there weren’t any left that she realized she had finished the tray. She smiled. She felt numb. She liked feeling numb. A couple seconds later, her cheeks got flushed. She began to feel extremely warm. She needed air, so she set off to the front door. She stumbled a little, but too discreetly for anyone to notice. She made it to the front door. She turned the handle and took a couple steps outside.

+-----------------------+
                He finally saw an opportunity to escape the conversation and escaped by saying he needed air. He smiled to himself. He left the dining room and entered the den. He walked through groups of people and checked beside the refreshment table. The girl in the dark green dress was gone. He turned around and looked towards the doorway. He caught a glimpse of a girl stumbling, heading towards the front door…in a dark green dress. He made his way through the crowds of people, some of them even giving him weird looks, but he didn’t care. He finally made it to the glass door. He turned the handle and took a couple steps outside.
                The girl in the dark green dress was sitting on the front porch with her hands folded in her lap. She was looking towards the sky. Her hair was still draped across the sides of her face, but he could see the smile she wore in the moonlight.  He smiled to himself. He took another swig of whiskey from the bottle.
                “It’s a beautiful night tonight, especially since you’re in it,” he said smoothly.
                “Oh it is, is it…” She chuckled and looked towards him. As soon as she looked at him her smile disappeared in an instant. It’s him. She thought. Her heart fell to the pit of her stomach.
                “It… It’s you.” They both said harmoniously.
                “I saw you and I wanted to find out who you were, but I suppose I should have known the most beautiful girl in the room would’ve been you,” he said as he took a couple steps towards her.
                “I’m so sorry. I better go,” She stood up and dusted herself off and started to make her way to the front door so she could return to the party.
                “Please don’t leave, I have something to say,” He turned towards her and was about to reach out for her, but stopped half way. He tightened his grip and pulled back his hand.
                “I can’t….” She whispered. That was all her heart could let her do.
                “Anna, I need you to forget about me. I need you to move on. We need to be able to come to a party and pretend that we don’t know each other. We need to forget that we ever loved each other. You look at me and every time you do you have to make sure your heart doesn’t break. I don’t want that for you. I want you to be happy. I want you and I to have happy memories and not these. Not the ones where we keep trying to hide from each other,” he said with no breaks for air. He was spilling his soul out to her.
                “Pretend? Really? I don’t want to have to pretend that I don’t know you, because everyone in that room already knows.  Everyone will always know. We can be in a room full of strangers and they would feel the connection we will always have. How is it that I love you more than the world, but you want me to simply forget? How can you be so cruel?” She spat out.
                “Please just listen to me,” He reached out and hugged her, crushing her into his chest. He could smell the familiar shampoo’s scent that lingered in her hair. She didn’t say a word. He continued, “I found happiness. I’m on the other side of the world. I am far away from you. There cannot be something made out of nothing. I am happy. I am without you. Can’t you see your punishing yourself?”
                “I’m… not. I’m not punishing myself. Why would I punish myself with love?” She sobbed.
                “Because the love you have for me will never erase. It will never fade. It will be the poison that corrodes your soul. It’ll be the reason you’ll die,” He said softly in her ear.
                “Then for this one moment, this one moment, hold me like you love me one last time. I’ll let you go, I don’t want to die,” She whispered.
 
                He didn’t say a word and simply obeyed to her last command. He wrapped his arms around her body. She wrapped her arms around his body and rested her head on his chest. A piece of her broke again. A piece of him broke again. They stood like this for what seemed like hours. Secretly, he did not want to let her go, but he had to. He had to let her go, because the ring that was now on his finger bounded him to his happiness. Because of his happiness, he had to let her go, so that in return, she would find her own.

 

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