Thoughts for the Day: Picking up the Pieces

I wish I was brand new. I woke up today and realized that you were a thorn in my shoe. I walked into my kitchen and grabbed a broom. I started sweeping up the pieces that were left by you. Each memory I swept away was a deep breath and words I never got to say. I let one tear fall. Nothing more. I won't let you keep hovering over my life, this isn't the calm before the storm. You echo in my head, the many sorry formed words you've said. Flashbacks continue to course through my heart,  it forms visions of you tearing me apart. I cry out for help; Where are you now? I'm afraid sometimes, to even leave my house. These bruises keep taunting me, keep yelling at me. Too many voices in my head, can't I just be? I keep blaming myself that it was my fault that it got out of control, I feel so helpless like I can't become whole. I ache for the pain in my heart to leave, for you to walk away and to just let me be. I gag with the words that keep forming in my throat, something you've once told me: No, no more. The sensations in my hands still hasn't returned, my blood has yielded, it is preparing for war. When a touch lingers on my skin, I want to embrace the thought, instead I cringe. Hopefully in time, I'll learn to be me, that one day, I'll be free from all these memories.