There is a part of me that constantly keeps worrying. Over and over I keep trying to be happier. Just be happier. But nothing seems to keep me there. There are special places and people, that for a moment I seem like I am happy, but the darkness that looms around me keeps me in such a sorrow state. Time is supposed to heal, but When? when is it supposed to be alright. I keep telling myself it'll be okay, it will work out in the end. I'm trying so hard to keep being optimistic and hopeful; but then there is everything else that keeps rejecting and making me feel worse. There is a point to where you can keep being happy and then to the point where you just want to just quit. Let us just give up already. I mean damn, why is it so hard. It's just so hard and life just sucks. Then where is the advice that I have been given where does it fit into my life. Am I just constantly pushing it away, or is it just life just testing me?
Then there is everything that constantly keeps making feel like a complete waste of space. I'm jsut a waste. Nothing is ever good enough is it. It will never be. Life keeps getting in the way and I hate it so much that I can't just keep going on like this.
Im taking the time to finally cut every single tie to everyone. Im tired.
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