I was in another life last night. I had the choice to stay and have the magic I always wanted.
At first I wasn't conscience of it at first and I was going through these motions, but there were people after me again. I didn't have Kelsee as my best friend. One of my arch enemies was my lover. I was going to a wedding of someone that was dead but was alive in this reality. I almost got arrested for walking around late at night because in this world they had a curfew. Some of my friends had kids and when I saw them I couldn't take them seriously. When my so-called friends finally realized it wasn't me they took me to this nice apartment loft which had a spectacular view of the city. I saw chalk and what was beginning of a power circle, I walked over to the table and began to finish drawing it. The girls around me, which apparently were my best friends grabbed my hands and helped me call the forces which had helped me get here in the first place.
I called out, "Oh magical ancestors of each of us, the magic that flows through are veins, do you hear us?"
And the fireplace in the den roared.
"I have figured that I am in another world because of the existence of magic, is that right?"
Nothing.
"If I wanted to stay could I stay here? I felt like I belonged."
The fire flickered and displayed words onto the wall it said, "What if things like even your parents have changed? Your friends? Your lover?"
I called out, "I don't care! Let me stay here! Ill keep my mouth shut!"
The fire flickered again, "If you can accomplish the task of seeing yourself and staying then indeed we will let you stay." Then the fire died.
One of my friends let go of our hands.
I took a deep breath. It took a lot of energy.
The only thing I could wrap around my head was that I was magical. In my other world I could meditate until I passed out and nothing, there was no trace of magic, but here I could do what I always wanted.
I stood in front of the window and I closed my eyes. I thought about weighing nothing, floating, flying.
I can do this I thought. I looked up at the ceiling and I bent my knees and I jumped and when I thought I was about to land back down on the ground I was holding onto the ceiling rafters. I laughed and thought that this was incredible. I made myself stand back on the ground. My friends laughed a little too to see how much I was amused.
Then one of my friends asked, "Sorry but we have to go find you."
And I stopped in my tracks, she was right. In order to stay here I needed to find myself. I asked where do we start? And they didn't have any answers. Oh wait I had magic! I went outside to the front yard and I sat in the dirt to connect to nature, I closed my eyes again and I started to feel for myself somewhere in this world. I felt spirits but I knew it wasn't mine. That's when I saw the faint glow of orange in the background. I followed it closer and that's when I noticed I was walking myself into a hospital room. People were crying. Wait was that my mother? My actual mother? And that's when I noticed it. I was the one laying in the bed, tubes were forced down my throat and threw my nose. Is that me? I thought.
"She didn't wake up." I heard my mom telling someone.
I gasped. I didn't wake up? That's what they meant. If I can stay after seeing this, what I'd become in my world, I could stay. I looked at myself and then my mom again. She couldn't see me and I realized now that I was my spirit looking back on myself, I wasn't meant to die in my dreams. I was in a dream. I shook my head and knew I couldn't stay here. That's when the friends I had in this reality said, "Morganna don't be afraid. You'll come back when you're ready." I nodded my head and I looked back at myself and I closed my eyes and touched my face and I thought about my heart beat. I thought about my skin.
"Oh ancestors I can't accept your offer. Forgive my stubbornness. I take with me this adventure. Let me into my body, let me wake up."
That's when an electric shock went through my hands to my body. That was when I woke up in my bed. I was back in the world I belonged in. I was physically exhausted. This dream walking had used up most of my mental energy. What would have happened if I chose to stay? I guess the good thing is that I'll never know.
No comments:
Post a Comment